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Post Info TOPIC: Jeff Foxworthy on Illinois


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Jeff Foxworthy on Illinois


Jeff Foxworthy on Illinois :

If your last governor is headed for prison and the governor before him
is already there, You might live in Illinois ...

If your latest US Senator lied to get the job, you might live in
Illinois ...

If your local Dairy Queen is closed from November through March,
You might live in Illinois ...

If someone in a store offers you assistance & they don't work there,
You might live in Illinois ...

If your dad's suntan stops at a line curving around the middle of his
forehead,
You might live in Illinois ...

If you have ever worn shorts and a parka at the same time, you might
live in Illinois ...

If your town has an equal number of bars and churches, you might live
in Illinois ...

If you have had a lengthy telephone conversation with someone who
dialed a wrong number, you might live in Illinois ...

YOU KNOW YOU ARE A TRUE Illinoisian WHEN:

1.  Vacation means going north or south on I-55 or I-57 for the weekend.

2.  You measure distance in hours.

3.  You know several people who have hit a deer more than Once.

4.  You often switch from heat to AC in the same day and Back again.

5.  You can drive 65 mph through 2 feet of snow during a raging
blizzard, without flinching.

6.  You see people wearing camouflage at social events (Including
weddings).

7. You install security lights on your house and garage and leave both
unlocked.

8.  You carry jumper cables in your car and know how to use them.

9.  You design your kids Halloween costume to fit over a snowsuit.

10. Driving is better in the winter because the potholes are filled
with snow.

11. You know all 5 seasons: almost winter, winter, still winter, road
construction, & It's Hot!

12. Your idea of creative landscaping is a statue of a deer next to
your blue spruce.

13.. Down south means Missouri to you.

14. A brat is something you eat.

15. Your neighbor throws a party to celebrate his new pole shed.

16. You go out to a tailgate party every Friday..

17. You have more miles on your snow blower than your car.

18. You find 0 degrees a "little chilly."

19. You actually understand these jokes, and you forward them to all
your Illinois friends. (What's not to understand?)


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Posts: 2098
Date:

can you relate tango. hahaha, i'll bet thats purdy dang close.

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